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Confucius: Jokes, Quotations and History. Confucius (551B.C.-479B.C.) was a great thinker in ancient China. His philosophies gained prominence in China over other doctrines for 2,000 years from Han Dynasty (206B.C.-220A.D.) to Qing Dynasty (1644A.D.-1911A.D.) Like Lao Tzu and Chuang Tzu, Confucius was a humorous philosopher in Chinese.


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50 Funny Confucius Quotes and Words. Confucius said, "A man who eats a lot of noodles will have a long nose, but not necessarily great wisdom.". "Woman who thinks she can do anything will surely have a busy day, and messy hair.". "A man who tries to catch the wind with his hands will end up with a headache, but not with the wind.".


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Let these Confucian quotes guide you in life. "Everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it." "They must often change who would be constant in happiness or wisdom." "What the superior man seeks is in himself; what the small man seeks is in others." "In a country well governed, poverty is something to be ashamed of.


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Best of Confucius Quotes Quotes. 1. "Man who open car door for girlfriend reveal one thing: either car is new or girlfriend is new.". 2. "Behind every successful man is good woman — and very surprised mother-in-law.". 3. "No husband ever been shot while he do dishes.". Hey there!


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Confucius Jokes about the Simple Joys of Clothing's Potentials. Confucius say: Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day. Confucius say: Panties not best thing on earth, but next to it. Confucius say: Man with hand in pocket is having a ball. Confucius say: Woman who wear G-string, high on crack!


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Funny Confucius Quotes About Dating and Marriage. #24. "When man bring wife flowers for no reason, there usually reason.". #25. "Passionate kiss like spider's web soon lead to undoing of fly.". #26. "Boy fool with girl in wrong period get caught red handed.". #27.


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We have also added humorous sayings and quotes styled as Confucius quotes for a light-hearted touch. Remember these quotes are funny one-liners and have pretty much nothing to do with Confucianism. Best Funny Confucius Quotes #1 "War not determine who is right, war determine who is left." #2 "He who has a sharp tongue, cuts own throat." #3


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Joke #3. A man goes to a fortune teller and asks if he will be wealthy. The fortune teller says, "You will be wealthy, but not for long.". The man asks why and the fortune teller says, "Because you will die before your money runs out.".


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Confucius say man who sink in woman's arms, soon have arms in woman's sink. 31. Confucius say man piss in wind, wind piss back. 30. Confucius say man who get kicked in testicles, left holding the bag. #29 - 20. Confucius Say Jokes. 29. Confucius say girl who marry detective, like to kiss dick.


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Confucius' sayings are famous for being short and to the point. Also, plenty of his sayings rely on multiple meanings of certain words. These quotes follow that same pattern. "Confucius says," jokes are a great way to make myself laugh when I feel down. So, We've selected some of the best funny Confucius jokes to make you crack up.


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Introduction. Confucius, the ancient Chinese philosopher, is known for his profound wisdom and teachings. However, in the spirit of lightheartedness, we've imagined some humorous "Confucius says" one-liners that playfully blend his wisdom with a touch of humor. So, sit back, relax, and enjoy these witty and comical Confucius sayings that will tickle your funny bone.


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Funny Confucius Quotes About Dating and Marriage. #24. "When man bring wife flowers for no reason, there usually reason.". #25. "Passionate kiss like spider's web soon lead to undoing of fly.". #26. "Boy fool with girl in wrong period get caught red handed.". #27. "Woman who dates gambler, gets cheated on.".


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We have put together the funniest collection of "Confucius Says" jokes. These jokes have been around for donkeys years and are still classic as ever. Firstly, who was Confucius? According to National Geographic, "Confucius was a Chinese philosopher, politician, and teacher whose message of knowledge, benevolence, loyalty, and virtue were the main guiding philosophy of China for thousands of.


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The man who asks a question is a fool for a minute, the man who does not ask is a fool for life. Confucius. Love, Inspirational, Funny. The funniest people are the saddest once. Confucius. Love, Funny, Sad. When music and courtesy are better understood and appreciated, there will be no war. Confucius.


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10. "Three things cannot long be hidden: the sun, the moon, and the truth."—. Confucius. 11. "The object of the superior man is truth." —Confucius. 12."What you do not wish upon.


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"Confucius Funny Quotes" finds these light-hearted, funny quotes that offer a unique perspective on life, relationships and human nature. Although Confucius is best known for his profound philosophical teachings, these quotes demonstrate his ability to mix humor with wisdom. This collection is a delightful journey into the lighter side of.

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